How to Make Friends? / Как подружиться?

Let’s be honest, there are times when you want to know how to make friends.Here are some steps and tips to help you overcome these obstacles.

Spend more time around people. Don’t be mean; you do not want to losefriends. If you want to make friends, you first need to put yourself out theresomehow in order to meet people. If you’re still in school, sit somewhere withother people. It doesn’t have to be the «popular» table, or a crowded one, but onewith at least two other people. The popular kids won’t matter when you’re older,but a true friend will be there for you forever. Remember, friends seldom comeknocking on your door while you sit at home playing computer games. Popularsaren’t always going to be mean to you. They just need to know you a little better.

Join an organization or club with people who have common interests. Youdon’t necessarily need to have a lot of common interests with people in order tomake friends with them. In fact, some of the most rewarding friendships arebetween two people who don’t have much in common at all, but if you like aspecific topic, try searching for just a location. It’s a great way to meet new localpeople! Social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter and Google+ are greatway to meet new people and learn more about the people you meet. When you arechatting just say are you on Facebook? or what is your name on Twitter? A church,Masjid (mosque) or other house of worship is a great place to start since you haveat least a religious faith in common. Just remember to be safe on the internet, youdon’t know who is actually on the other end most of the time.

Join a sports team. A common misconception about this is that you have to bereally good at playing a particular sport in order to make friends with others on theteam, but not all teams are so competitive. As long as you enjoy the sport andsupport your teammates, joining a local team with a laid-back attitude could be agreat way to make new friends. But a sports team isn’t the only way. If you playinstruments or sing, try joining a band or choir.

Talk to people. You can join a club, go to school, or go to church but you stillwon’t make friends if you don’t actually talk to people. By the same token, you don’t have to be involved with an organization to be social, and any time you talkto someone, you have a chance at making a lasting friend. You can talk toanybody: the clerk at the video store, the person sitting next to you on the bus, orthe person in front of you in the lunch line. Don’t be too picky. Mostconversations will be a dead-end of sorts, when you may never talk to that personagain, or you just remain acquaintances – but once in a while you’ll actually makea friend.

Make eye contact and smile.If you have an unfriendly countenance, people areless likely to be receptive to your friendship. Try not squinting (get some glasses),looking bored, frowning or appearing blankly deadpan, folding your arms (thispractically screams «don’t talk to me») or hanging out in a corner; such habits maymake you look troubled or disinterested.

Start a conversation. There are many ways to do this; a comment about yourimmediate environment (The weather is a classic: «At least it’s not raining like lastweek!»), a request for help («Can you help me carry a few boxes, if you have aminute?» or «Can you help me decide which one of these is a better gift for mymom?») or a compliment («That’s a nice car.» or «I love your shoes.»). Follow upimmediately with a related question: Do you like this warm weather? What kindsof gifts do you normally buy for your mom? Where did you get shoes like that?

Introduce yourself at the end of the conversation. It can be as simple as saying»Oh, by the way, my name is…». Once you introduce yourself, the other personwill typically do the same. Remember his or her name! If you show that youremembered things from your past conversation(s) with the person, not only willyou look intelligent but he or she will see that you were paying attention and arewilling to be a true friend.

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